Tag Archives: existential angst

Day 14 – My Climb Out of Depression

Yesterday’s choices were completely unskillful!  Blah. I have the implicit deadline of my savings account yet I procrastinate, postpone, and ruminate. I am frozen in inactivity, smothered by my own lethargic lack of momentum. Going to start with basics!  Just do … Continue reading

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Day 12 AM Entry – My Climb Out of Depression

I know, I know! “What happened to Days 9, 10, & 11?”  We don’t need no steenking days 9, 10, & 11!  There’s a reason depression kills people.  I heard someone once describe depression as being excessively self-indulgent and this rings … Continue reading

Posted in Depression | Tagged , | Leave a comment

Day 8, AM Entry – My Climb Out of Depression

I’ve been making these entries first thing each morning. This is not optimal. I’m so busy with rumination, acting out obsessive compulsive behavioral pattern, that I think I’m viewing this entry as the only thing I need to do each … Continue reading

Posted in Depression | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Day 7 – My Climb BACK DOWN INTO Depression

Damn it! This is ridiculous! I know what will make me happy, what lifts my consciousness and what does not! I know if I busy myself with FaceBook browsing, watching movie after movie on Netflix, reading excessively, endlessly checking my … Continue reading

Posted in Depression | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Day 6 – My Climb Out of Depression

I hate appearing as weak or ineffectual to her. I think there could be something important still to play out betwen us… Maybe my confession of depression has ruined that possibility. It’s too late to worry about that now; the … Continue reading

Posted in Depression | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Day 5 – My Climb Out of Depression

April 30, 2013 Better or worse?  Who can tell.  I confessed (partially) to B about how bad I’m feeling. Yesterday, I returned to the gym for another hour plus of cardio exercise.  I sat with Lou (virtually at 9) for … Continue reading

Posted in Depression | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment

Day 4 – My Climb Out of Depression

April 29, 2012 Oops! Clearly this is NOT working! I felt worse than ever yesterday!  Why can’t I ask for help? Why must I endlessly spin my wheels? Felt highly anxious and depressed all day.  Went for a walk with … Continue reading

Posted in Depression | Tagged , , , | Leave a comment